Some people I know own a second home for a vacation home. They tell me go there to escape their regular real life as it is hectic, stressful and (fill in the blank). (To clarify: my life will not include rewilding that’s not my path with my husband.) I told my husband a few years ago I always wanted a little cabin on a lake in the woods as a second home to go to and live in summer and escape to since his career wouldn’t allow living in such a place. Anyhow a few yrs ago I had an epiphany that really what I should be doing instead of living in stress and fantasizing about what might, might happen someday (buying a vacation home) a better idea would be to make changes in our lives that makes our home life in the home we own a place of harmony and somewhere I don’t want to run away from to seek solstice.

When my friends tell me they wish they had a second home in order to run away from stress at home I tell them my thoughts and they are shocked to hear that idea. Why is this so shocking? Why do Americans seek buying expensive vacations or a vacation home as a normal good thing to escape stress at home and think that making positive changes to reduce stress at home is a nutty idea?

Now I understand there is nothing like visiting a place different than your home, getting into the woods or the seashore or even visiting a foreign country to see another culture…but…the point is let’s make our lives something we love living not something we always want to run away from nearly every day of our lives.

About video games I feel they give a person a sense of mastery and control (and some fun) that are not always as easy to obtain in the real world. I once read a father’s writings in a magazine saying he hates video games for kids but who can blame a pretty powerless child from being drawn to play a video game in a virtual world he pretty much controls and to do things that achieve mastery and checking off accomplishments and getting medals and leveling up and such? Who can blame a kid for getting such instant gratification when he is powerless in the real, big world?

One more thing: there was a highly disturbing TED lecture about the emotions and video gaming. Using brain scanning and other psychological things they know about our minds the video game designers are making games right now that can provide people with highly satisfying emotions as they play which basically, for most people will trump the emotions they feel for real humans in their lives. The addictions that result and playing lots of hours in a day winds up isolating the players and keeping them from developing friends they see face to face. This is scary for our society.

Here is the video lecture URL:

http://www.ted.com/talks/david_perry_on_videogames.html

Summary from TED site: “Game designer David Perry says tomorrow’s videogames will be more than mere fun to the next generation of gamers. They’ll be lush, complex, emotional experiences — more involving and meaningful to some than real life.”

Oh one more thing, in that lecture Perry says the future of video game money making is not for kids and teens but to expand the market to older people including senior citizens!

I tried the same tactic (breaking the CD, not my hands) on Neverwinter Nights a few years ago, only to find out to my horror, that after the latest patch, the game no longer required the CD to run. I almost cried then, too. It was like making a break for the sacrificial temple door, only to see it slowly shut just before you hit the daylight.

On the subject of video games. I use to play a lot of pinball and asteroids and Pac Man on Atari. That’s about as involved as I ever got into the gaming world…:-) But I’ve got a few friends that use to spend most of their waking hours playing games on their computer, one of them didn’t sleep for a couple days straight because they were so into it. Personally, I don’t know how they did it. I could never sit still for that long.

Great post, Scout. I can’t wait to here more.

Curt

Of the handful of games I had the patience to play I’d say Quest for Glory actually had a noticeable effect on me. SO YOU WANT TO BE A HERO?

I don’t know much about console games – never owned one. I could drink all the sodas in Chrono Trigger. Nobody else I knew could. & the musics great… many fond memories of rolling through retirement communities with the windows down and the Sephiroth Choir cranked up to maximum volume…

I think video games can and do inspire, frquently providing sparks to light the players sense of wonder and otherness, amplifying imaginations and excercising the mental muscles utilizied in problem solving. although I doubt I’ll ever sit down and play one again, I’m thankful for their brief yet colorful influence during my youth.

like you said, once you’re free — that shit don’t compare.

I tried playing Civ a lot. I really loved the early on exploring. Trireme were awesome. But pretty soon after that the game would get boring to me. I like the fighting and strategy, I just didn’t want to have to compete so fiercely with another group that was obviously going to win out in the arms race that I didn’t even care about. Little did I know at the time that I just wanted to be an erratic retaliator.

I think I’m in the same boat as far as escapism is concerned. Now I want to actually escape. Let’s get the fuck out of here.

ps, I had got fed up with the conversation over at you know where a while back, so I didn’t realize that it had been ended. I think that’s really lame, and I appreciate you sharing your story. I will try to separate the message from the messenger and refrain from throwing away all my books in retaliation for what seems to me like cult-ish close-mindedness on their part.